Changing Your Focus

by Vickie G. Paver

Sometimes, when we are ill or dealing with debilitating physical problems, it affects the way we think. During this time, Melancholy and Mournful can move into our lives and not want to leave. Now, they have their place when tragedy strikes, but they aren't companions that we want to stick around for a long time. If we let them, they take up so much energy. They block, distort, fog, and skew our view. Before you know it, we can't see anything good in life. Instead of enjoying all the things we do have, we waste mass amounts of energy contemplating things like: Why are we sick?  How will we make up all the lost time? Will it always be this way? Our focus becomes so narrowed, generally meaning we are focusing on ourselves. Don't take this the wrong way. It is okay to take care of yourself by eating right, taking medicines, getting rest and so on. But when we start focusing on all the things that are happening to us, to the point of not seeing past Melancholy and Mournful, then it isn't healthy and we are missing all the good that life has to offer. It is okay to hurt, but not to wallow in self-pity.

Last Sunday, on my way to church, I found myself in such circumstances. I brought Melancholy and Mournful along in the truck with me. I didn't feel like being joyful or thankful. I was wallowing. I felt that I was entitled because we had been sick for so long.  I didn't even realize that my focus was so wacky. Well, as I was walking from our truck to the church doors, I saw my brother sitting in his van. I stopped to talk for a little bit. He said, "Did you see the daffodils peeking out of the church garden?"  I told him that I did and then went on to say something very negative about how winter wasn't yet over.

Later, I began to think. He was pointing out something that should have given me joy. Instead of being cheered by it, I only saw what Melancholy and Mournful wanted me to see. Bringing these two companions to church impaired my focus. After church, I went home and decided it was time to kick them out of the house. So I invited Thankfulness and Joy to visit. Thankfulness and Joy allowed me to look on the bright side of life. Melancholy and Mournful didn't stick around for long after that. I guess they didn't like the company.

Every thing after that took on new meaning. I took a walk by our pond, and was able to enjoy the ripples on the pond surface caused by the wind. I took pleasure in examining my black raspberry bushes which are showing the first signs of life in the face of spring. Then I imagined our garden in my mind and all the vegetables I was going to plant. As I sit here writing this now, I am also reminded of something my cousin once told me while lying flat on her back with Lou Gehrig's disease. She said that she was thankful that she could at least read her Bible. Now mind you, it had to be propped up with a special gadget made by her husband because she did not have the strength to hold it. That is thankfulness. She was surely filled with the joy of the Lord. It makes me repentant of wasting all my energy looking at things in a negative way instead of in a positive way. I won't waste my time though looking at wasted time (grin,) but will take it as one more lesson from God. It may be I'll even have to have refresher courses, but I pray that I won't have to have too many. It is better to learn it the first time around and not forget the lesson. Once again I would like to quote a familiar Proverb, "A merry heart does good, like medicine, But a broken spirit dries the bones."